Selfies: Am I Hot Or What?

Posted by Viktoria Michaelis on November 26, 2014 in Immoral Conversations |

It’s a question every single teenager, and probably many who are considerably older, will ask themselves at some time or another. Maybe not the exact wording, maybe not ‘hot’, but attractive, presentable, sexy, bootilicious, interesting and, of course, fat. Regardless of the word used, you can almost read the question in their eyes, and pleading, puppy-eyed look begging an answer. Are they brave enough to voice the question, or just hoping someone will come up with an answer of their own volition?

Photo Source: unknown, via imgsrc

If they don’t come out with the question, if they aren’t all that forthright, you can be sure they will try to convince someone that an answer should be given. And the best way to do the convincing? Why, send out a really hot selfie of course!

Pack all those good looks into a small area and send it out over the airways. What can possibly go wrong? Isn’t dating an online thing these days? Don’t we all find that perfect person of our dreams through a smart phone, even if they happen to live next door and we pass them ever single day. Head down, concentrating on the small screen, who has time to see the real life, the really attractive people all around us all the time?

Photo Source: unknown, via imgsrc

So, make yourselves up, make sure the hem line is high, or low, depending on the angle of your photograph, and make a face which is going to be attractive, enticing, appealing, sexy. And that means, of course, the duckface, because only a vision with pursed lips can be attractive. After all, we want them to know exactly what is going to be latching on to their face during that first kiss.

Photo Source: unknown, via imgsrc

Takes a bit of practice, I will admit, but that’s what a mirror is for. Check out the looks, the lips, the eyebrows, and go for it!

Photo Source: unknown, via imgsrc

Unless you happen to have a few other assets which might take someone special’s attention away from the face of a duck.

Photo Source: unknown, via Tumblr

I wonder whether people only take photographs, or whether they still practice on the mirror, on the crook of their arm, the back of their hand? I’d be highly attracted to Miss Anonymous Blond, if she didn’t appear to have a mouth more like a sucker which could take hours to detach from my own. Fine, some kissing can take hours and I have no problem with that, but really, this looks like a plunger.

Photo Source: unknown, via Tumblr

So much hard work, and really good-looking, ruined. Of course, if she was English, she might claim this as being patriotic: her mouth looks like a deep red poppy. The rest is wonderful, just leave that duckface at home.

Love & Kisses, Viki.

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