So, Where Did You Want To Go Again?

Posted by Viktoria Michaelis on January 16, 2017 in Internet |

This is probably not where you wanted to end up, in the eternal loop of the Matrix. You typed something completely different into your browser, or set a bot to do the searching for you, and expected to find something else. At worst, you’d have thought, a 404 page. At best, well, perhaps you were looking for a way to break in and tried to enter the URL for a theme file on the backend of this server, or for another file where you know there is a weakness, where you know that you could break in.

Life, however, is not quite so easy. You are being watched, you are being followed. Every single tap of your little fingers on that keyboard, it’s going into the eternal loop of the Matrix. You are going to be swirled in and lost forever, forgotten to man, to history. Your whole life, wasted. You will burn.

Sucking It All Up

Photo Source: NASA’s Marshall Space Flight Center – Creative Commons

What was it then, one of these perhaps


Or perhaps you were a little more creative with


and still you ended up here. How can that be? What went wrong?

Let me tell you a little story: you’ve enough time, after all, you’re in the loop of the Matrix now, you’re not going anywhere in a hurry.

It’s all about visitors, clicks and statistics. When someone hits a 404 page, it doesn’t show up as a visit to the site, no matter how well produced and enthralling that 404 page may be, no matter how much time has been spent decorating it, adding links to other possibilities which might be of interest on the site, it is a nothing click. And every single day I have people like you, looking for something which I do not want to share, trying to wander nonchalantly into the working bits of my server and poke around in my privates. You think that I don’t notice. You think trying to grab me by the intimate bits and pieces of my website is going to go unnoticed, unregarded, but you are wrong. Eventually everyone has to stand up for what they have done, be it a British football trainer, pop star or radio presenter from the Seventies finally caught and brought before the courts for child abuse or a president-elect somewhere else in the world.

But right now you’re in the loop. In the Matrix. You’ve been caught, and trapped. Luckily I’m a vegetarian, otherwise there would be skinning and roasting on the menu too. So, rather than wasting your valuable (!) time trying to break into my server and ruin one of the few virtual pleasures I have in life, why don’t you browse a few of the posts here and find something interesting to pass the time? Grab yourself a coffee – or a Monster Energy Drink if that’s your thing – settle down and appreciate rather than ruin. You’ll feel so much better for it, and I’ll be able to pack away the fire extinguisher and barbecue.

  • Viktoria Michaelis.

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